He Won't Remember a Thing

They threw me slap out of the hospital today. I’m just glad they didn’t take my camera from me.

As part of my plan to reduce my chances of a heart attack from 13% to a single digit, (see previously posted Smoltzie blog), I visited another doctor today. This particular doctor is a gastroenterologist who happens to specializes in diseases of the gastrointestinal tract. As I have mentioned before, I was born with a fairly irritable one.

I had to look up how to spell gastroenterologist. I’ve also had to look up more than a few restrooms in my life...in a hurry.

When I was getting my prostate checked three weeks ago at the first doctor I visited, he told me I needed to exercise more. Although it was difficult to cough at that particular moment, I heard him.

I have exercised 19 of the 21 days since I was there.

I have gotten up at daylight and walked the streets of Gadsden, Birmingham, Victoria and Bastrop. I’ve even met new friends before dawn jogging next to me on a treadmill. I have walked the sidewalks in downtown Houston checking behind me as I walked to be sure some drug crazed wild man wasn’t slipping up on me from behind. I've even skipped the train and walked all the way to baggage claim at the Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport.

I don’t know if I’ve dropped a percent or not in my quest to lower my chance of a heart attack, but I am definitely putting forth the effort.

As I mentioned, the other part of the initial plan was to visit the particular doctor I visited today. My mother had colon cancer at one point in her life and the doctor thought I better get checked out myself.

The doctor was very nice... until he began to describe the procedure he was planning for me.

I don’t know what it is, but when I heard the word "insert" in the same sentence with the word "rectum", I began to get rather nervous. He told me he would drug me and I won't remember a thing.

Yeah right.

I appreciate his kindness and all that. But one thing bothered me. He had a little smile on his face the entire time he was explaining the procedure. I was thinking – I sure hope he doesn’t enjoy this. At any rate, I made the appointment for August 10 to have this procedure done.

I then decided I would check out the place where they do these procedures.

I couldn’t believe how rude those people were to me. My goodness, I just wanted to see how they do it

I'm sure the the poor man lying on the table won’t remember a thing.



But I did get a quick photo in case he wants his memory jogged.