Monday, September 03, 2007

Align - A Better Way to Pay Your Dues


To be a member in good standing with the IBS society you have to pay your dues. The dues you pay are not monetary but are personal in nature. I have read that 20% of the adult population in America has symptoms of IBS. I am definitely in that group. And I have paid my dues.

Irritable Bowel Syndrome, by the way, is a disorder characterized most commonly by cramping, abdominal pain, bloating, constipation, and diarrhea. It can hit you in the grocery store, at church, while you are riding down the road in your car or even while you are giving a speech in front of five hundred people. The dues you pay can be somewhat embarrassing at times.

My brother, who is a minister, was preaching at someone else’s church one Sunday morning and had to get the song leader to come up and do some congregational singing right in the middle of his sermon. He left the pulpit for about 10 minutes and returned to finish the sermon. IBS has a way of stripping you of all dignity but I think the offering was very good that Sunday. They felt sorry for him. I have another brother who was riding a ski lift up a Colorado mountain and he had to suddenly jump off the lift. And in front of a lot of folks who found the scene quite humorous he did in the snow what most people do in private. My brothers have paid their dues.

I have a friend who was traveling with some business associates one morning when his “phone started ringing.” They stopped the car and he jumped out and ran in the first store he could find while his co-workers waited in the car. After a long wait they got worried about their friend and decided to go in to check on him. They laughed when they saw him sitting in the Barber’s chair getting a haircut. He figured that was the least he could do since the barber allowed him to use the restroom. He paid his dues.


A couple of months ago after writing about one of my IBS stories on this blogspot, I got an email from a marketing agency that is working with Proctor & Gamble to market a new product they have for people like me. The product is called Align. I agreed to be one of their guinea pigs and I have now finished my test. Several of you, including the Marketing Agency, have been waiting to hear the results of the test.

I must confess that I didn’t exactly take a pill every day. I took one most days but it is hard for me to remember to take a pill every night before I go to bed or even when I get up in the morning. In other words, if I had to take birth control pills every day to keep from getting pregnant, I would be very pregnant. But I took a pill most days.

If I told you that I had no intestinal contractions in the last two months, some of you out there would know I was lying. In fact the group I was with just last week in Louisiana had to rush me back to the hotel after dinner and put me out at the front door before they could even park the car. I wondered what the hotel clerk thought when I ran by her counter. And the man I almost ran over in a hotel in Nashville rushing back to my room a few weeks ago remembered my name when I saw him a couple of days later in the elevator. Not sure how he got my name but he seemed to get a kick out of my dilemma. And my co-workers who were with me got a kick out of it as well and they would know I was lying if I told you I have been IBS free for the past two months.

But I will tell you there were several days running and maybe even a couple of weeks when I had absolutely no symptoms. I think they are on to something with this Align and I would highly recommend it to all those out there who are paying your IBS dues on a regular basis.

Align is a dietary supplement that works naturally to help build a healthy, balanced digestive system by helping to restore the balance of “good” bacteria. I’m not sure what it costs but I’m sure it will cost less than the dues you are paying now.

I’m sure most of you IBS'ers spend that much on the underwear you throw away every month.

You can buy Align at your local pharmacy or you can CLICK HERE to order. It’s definitely a better way to pay your dues.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love reading your blogs on IBS. It is nice to hear of others experiences. I am like you, I know way too much about public restrooms.

Anonymous said...

Thank God for speedy elevators.

T.O.

Anonymous said...

Judy Sanders has offically come out of the closet with her "IBS" problem. It's to hear an honest woman for a change.

Anonymous said...

First, who are you and how did you know my last name? I am honest about everything. I don't have a problem telling my age either. I am very thankful that the Good Lord has given me 57 wonderful years. Now the one thing I just will not tell is how much I weigh. Let's just leave it at, just too much.